Have you ever been to a show and been so overwhelmed by the positive atmosphere that you just had to shout something? Well, having been to more than a handful of shows, I deem myself an expert in the area of yelling things. Behold, what follows is sacred wisdom.
1. "GOD DAMN IT, KICK SOME ASS!"
This is a quote from Forrest Gump that Lt. Dan says when Forrest is in the army with Bubba. The satisfaction gained from shouting this is very fulfilling.
2. "USE YOUR INSIDE VOICE!"
I shouted this at a show once and some people laughed, so it's on the list.
3. "LESS TUNING, MORE SPOONING!"
Nathan from Clearwater's Phaedo introduced me to this phrase, and once having realized the cliché status of "less talk, more rock", this expression will prove an apt substitute. Besides, musicians only tune on stage to boost their rock star points, and any amount of on stage spooning would simply be amazing.
4. "WHAT?!"
This is to be shouted when musicians are trying to warm up to the crowd by bantering and pattering. If you wish to discourage the band, use this technique repeatedly.
5. "DRUM SOLO!"
Another cliché phrase (especially during acoustic acts) that can only be pulled off when you are too wasted to care what's going on within a five-mile radius of your incapacitated self.
6. "MY TUMMY HURTS!"
This is best utilized during metal and hardcore shows when the majority of patrons are hailing Satan, slam dancing, beating their chests or shouting "ooh-wah-ah-ah-ah!" Another good one is "IT'S PAST MY BED TIME!"
Go and do likewise.
2 comments:
Hah, these are excellent man. They remind me of a comedy bit by Zach Galifianakis in which he says that he likes to be more specific when he's in the crowd at a concert, intstead of going "woo" or "yeah" he'll say something like "the way you play your music makes me feel good inside!" and he urges people not to boo, instead be more specific "why are you doing that? ... I hate that, I hate it!"
someone should put a dick in your mouth for shouting this crap
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